"Why Low-Effort Men Don’t Deserve You! Advice I'd Share If You Were My Daughter "

I made a video about men and dating a while ago for my imaginary daughter, since I don't have a daughter myself and my family is full of boys. And I started that video by addressing my imaginary daughter and telling her, you are amazing, which she of course is. Now there was a small group of people in the comments that said, don't tell her that, you are messing her mind up. She's going to be pretentious. She's going to assume she deserves things. And that is what is wrong in relationships these days. Okay, well, dear imaginary daughter, you are still amazing. And please don't let anyone try to convince you otherwise. Your value is intrinsic and not up for debate. It's a given. Low effort men or narcissists or a small group of people in the comments section cannot change that. So whether you could be my imaginary daughter or sister or even grandmother, if you have ever forgotten how incredible you are, and especially if that was because of a bad man, then this video is for you. My name is Geert. I'm an author. I also use the pen name Brian Knox. I write about dating, relationships and other topics. And here is fact number one. You are amazing. You have conquered many challenges. I'm sure your life wasn't always easy. Perhaps it was super hard at times, but you did it. You are strong. You've overcome difficulties. You learn a lot and you have grown. So you don't need to prove anything to anyone to be amazing or to deserve love. And yes, I use the word deserve. If you are dating a man or are in a relationship with one, there are things you deserve. They come with the territory. If a man wants to enjoy your presence, your attention, your love, and everything you do for him, then you deserve things in return. That is just how it works. Relationships are never supposed to be one-sided. You give, give, give, and you don't deserve anything in return? Not in this galaxy. Fact number two. Dear imaginary daughter, you are already enough. For the right man, you will be more than enough. You don't need to change a single thing to be lovable. If you treat him with respect, the right man will feel incredibly lucky to have met you. And every man who doesn't agree with this statement simply is not the right man. If you are ever with a low effort man, remember that receiving the bare minimum is not love. It's an insult. If his idea of effort is liking one of your social media posts or replying to a message with a thumbs up emoji after that message was first stuck on scene for 24 hours, it's a sign from the universe that it's time to unfollow him and his nonsense. Number three. Never measure yourself and your worth by someone else's actions. When someone treats you poorly, that says everything about them and nothing about you. Your worth is not up for debate. Your value doesn't fluctuate based on who notices it. You are incredible, even if the wrong person failed to see it. That's why they are the wrong person. And don't worry about why that person cannot see it. You are not an eye doctor either. It's not your job to fix their vision. Number four. Here's something else to remember. There are men out there who are really broken. Not just wounded from life, but truly incapable of giving love in a healthy way. And these men can act like emotional vampires. They feed on the light, on the love, and on the confidence of the women they meet. And not to nourish the relationship, but to fill the empty voids inside themselves. These men don't see your worth as something to cherish. They see it as something to consume. They will take and take until there is nothing left. And when they have drained the woman of her sense of self-worth, they move on. Still broken, but now leaving her feeling empty and questioning her own value. But here's the truth, dear imaginary daughter. It's not your job to fix anyone. You cannot heal a man who refuses to heal himself. Your love and affection cannot fix a man or make him whole again when he doesn't even see or care about the cracks in his own soul. You deserve a partner, not a project. A man who adds to your life, not one who only takes from it. The right man, and there are many of them for you, will never leave you wondering if you are good enough. He will make it clear that you are, very often. When a man loves a woman, he will show that through effort, consistency, kindness, and respect. Not by giving leftovers of his attention. Real love is not a continuous chase. It's two people walking toward each other with a comparable level of intention and interest in making this relationship work. Fact number five. Your standards are your power. Low effort men will be very allergic to them. But when you set reasonable standards, you are not being demanding. Regardless of what a gaslighter may say. Reasonable standards are your way to invite the right people into your life. They are a filter. Your standards are filtering out the bad men. If a man ever says that your standards are the problem, there is a problem, all right. But it is not your standards. It's the gaslighter who's telling you this. When a man says something about your standards, even though they are reasonable, what he's really saying is, uh, why don't you let me get away with doing the bare minimum? Number six. Real love is also not being on an emotional roller coaster all the time. Even though that may sometimes feel like attraction or romantic excitement, it has nothing to do with love. Mixed signals are not romantic. They are signals to move on. When a man makes you doubt yourself, don't doubt his true intentions. The right man will make you feel safe, not anxious. Number seven. And this is really important. Effort is a form of love. Love isn't a grand gesture followed by weeks of silence or being too busy. It's small daily acts that say, I am here for you. I care about you. And I choose you. And finding the person that will do this is very hard. And rejection is part of the game. But remember, every person that rejects you or that you have to reject is directing you and is guiding you closer to the person who will love you the way you deserve. This is something you also often see in the comment section under my videos. Women who explain that because they were picky and didn't settle, they eventually found the right man for them. Which again is very hard. So don't give up. It's supposed to be hard. Number eight. If you are single, then it's okay and very normal to feel lonely at times. But know that being alone is far better than being with someone who makes you feel even lonelier in their presence. Every time you say no to the wrong man, you are saying yes to yourself. Now, let's stay with feeling lonely while being single. Loneliness is not a pleasant feeling. But loneliness is not a punishment. It's a space where you can heal and grow and dream and do things you will not experience in a relationship. When a caterpillar is in its cocoon and is becoming a butterfly, it's alone in there. For a very long time in butterfly years. But that's when the magic happens. If you are single, regardless of how many people will keep asking whether you have found someone yet, and after hearing the answer, regardless of how many of them will tell you not to worry and that you will find your special one, know that being single is never a failure. It's a time to discover yourself and to grow and to learn what you love about life and about yourself. The most important relationship you will ever have is the one you have with yourself. And when you get to a point where you love yourself fully, you will naturally attract people who value you at that same level. Think of it this way. If you create the life the right man wants to step into, you are attracting him in a very powerful way. And the word attraction is key. Attracting is the opposite of chasing. Which brings me to number nine. And this is just my personal opinion. But I think that women get much better results in their love life when they attract instead of chase. And if your mind ever worries about chasing after someone's love as if that is the prize you have to win, well, what if you are the prize? And I can already hear that small group in the comment section again. And for your information, I respect their opinion, even though mine is different. I'm glad when you leave a comment telling me what you think, even if you don't agree with anything I said. But I can hear some people think, The prize? If you consider yourself a prize or a prince or a princess, or worse, a queen or a king, that's just asking for problems. Is it really? We're talking about romantic relationships here. What are you supposed to feel like? The doormat? Here's the thing. Again, to the right person, we are the prize. They will love to invest time and attention in us. And they should. Because we will do the same for them. Feeling like a prize doesn't mean being entitled or self-centered. It means recognizing your value and expecting it to be honored in the same way you honor your partner's value. What are we doing in that relationship if we don't consider each other as a great catch? Someone truly special we are happy to be with. And that feeling should be mutual. Otherwise, we are just wasting our most precious resource, our time, and also our youth. Regardless of your age, in a couple of decades, you may possibly be willing to spend a ton of money to be the age again you are today. Never underestimate how valuable your time is. Choose wisely who you give it to. So thank you for giving some of it to me right now. I really appreciate that. And by the way, if you want me to make more videos like this one here, in this special format, please let me know that in the comments. And, dear imaginary daughter, or sister or grandmother, if you remember one thing from this video, let it be this. You are freaking amazing, as you are. And anyone who makes you feel otherwise doesn't belong in your story. And if you know anyone who could use a pep talk, please share this video with them. I also hope you appreciated this video. Again, please let me know in the comments if you want more of this. And if you are new here, make sure to visit brianknox.com for stuff I do not post over here. If you want to read one of my books, you can just type my pen name Brian Knox on Amazon to see a list of my books. As always, thank you for still being here at the very end of the video. I love it when you do that. And I hope to see you in another video.